Making a Change

Recently God has been showing and teaching me some new awesome things and I’m making a change. 

A Change to:

• remain in him
• to practice self-control
• to be filled by Him
• to grow

I’ve recently read Made to Crave by Lysa Terkeurst and I’ve been watching the weekly webcasts.  I never realized how much the Bible has to say about food.  I never realized that I valued my relationship with food above me relationship with God.  I went to food when I was stressed (usually peppermint kisses), when I was lonely (perusing the pantry shelves), when I was happy and celebrating (appetizer, big dinner & dessert), when I was bored… the list goes on.  Turns out what I was needing to do was to turn to Jesus and find my stress-relief, companionship, rejoicing & celebrating in Him.  This book has opened my eyes to that instead of craving food I need to be craving God.  I want to be in His word, learn more, be around Christian friends who are walking the walk. I want to be filled with Jesus so I spill Him all over my kids, my husband, my friends, and even strangers.  I want to eat better & honor Him with this temple He has entrusted to me.  I want to practice self-control and have all the other fruits of the Spirit as well- love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and gentleness.  I want to share these with others. 

One of the verses I really loves is Ephesians 1:17-20 which reads-

I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better.  I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength  he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms,

I want the Spirit of wisdom and revelation so that I may be enlightened so that I can be hopeful!

Another verse I love is Deuteronomy 2:3 which says- You have circled this mountain long enough, Now turn North.  That is what I am doing- I’m making a change, turning North.  I want to be a full-fledged Jesus girl!

Another passage I love is John 15:1-12.  It is the passage about Jesus being the vine and us the branches- which I has heard/read many times.  But I had never focused on the word remain.  In those 12 verses Jesus says remain 11 times.  This really struck me.  Jesus wants us to remain in Him at all times!  I want to remain in Jesus.  I don’t want to fade in and out, recommitting every Sunday, every time I yell at my kids, every time I say something I shouldn’t .  I want to remain. I want to remain in Jesus. 

This past weekend I had an opportunity to do just that.  Tim was gone and I was so anxious- I hate being alone.  I was in bed praying, quoting Psalms 23 and remaining with Jesus.  Just Him & I, I truly felt as if I was laying in His arms.  I felt Him say to me- turn off the alarm system.  I thought- that’s crazy!  There’s nothing wrong with having the alarm system, it’s not me not trusting You, it’s just extra security.  I wrestled with that for awhile and finally convinced myself that is wasn’t God saying to turn it off it was just my crazy mind talking.  I went back to praying and tried to go to sleep.  Around 11:30 pm my alarm started going off- “front door open” it said- while all the bells were going off.  I FREAKED out!  Jumped out of bed, got the gun & went to the top of the stairs.  The front door was locked and there was no evidence of an intruder.  CPI came over the microphone and asked if everything was o.  I told them I wasn’t sure and they waited for me to walk around and make sure there wasn’t anything abnormal.  I didn’t see anything and told them we were ok.  But I was SO scared- gone was my trust & remaining in Jesus, I was alone, I was scared but at least I had my gun.  I called Tim who had me call our friends who live right down the street who came over and walked around outside and inside and checked our house with me.  No signs of anything abnormal- so he went home (thanks Chad!).  I was still so scared- I crawled back into bed with my Bible & began praying for comfort and safety.  I felt the Lord there with me and knew I was ok.  He was in control & I was safe.  It still took me a long time to go to sleep but it was an awesome time with God.  He is teaching me to trust in Him & remain with Him.  If only I had turned off the alarm when I felt His prodding- the whole thing could have been avoided.  The next day I read 2 Corinthians 12:9-10- “My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness- For when I am weak then I am strong”.  Oh how I love that Jesus has grace and power to make me strong!

I’m also reading Tender Mercies for a Mother’s soul by Angela Thomas.  She recently came and spoke at MOPS and really challenged me.  She was saying that even though we are in the season of mothering & are so busy we need to make time to grow in Christ.  What it all boils down to is we need to be in the Word, seeking Jesus, walking with Him day to day so we can be Christ to our kids.  One thing she wrote and a friend emphasized is “You cannot impart, that which you don’t possess.”  WOW!  How many things am I trying to teach my kids that I don’t practice every day?  Wow.   Lord help me to know You better so that I can lead my children to You through the way I live.  She also talks about us being a cup and who/what we are trying to be filled with.  Jesus is the only One who can truly fill us- and I want to be full so I can “slosh out Jesus” on everybody else. 

As I said I’m making a change.  I want to be a Godly woman, wife, mother and friend.  That is what I ‘m pursuing.  Like in Psalms 42:1-2 I am thirsty for God.  I just wanted to share this, to write if down and commit.  I’m turning North- with my eyes fixed on Jesus.  I can’t wait to see what God will do!